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Article Contest Winner
Ancient (Mono) Artifact
Fetches 2000000 Space-Tix At Auction

Wrgl Tarkon-Fuentes, Newgarfieldtownshire, November
80th, 80085 VD

The Building was abuzz yesterday
regarding the incredible price fetched by the extremely rare
nondigital card "The Black Lotus."  The Sons of Buehler
Clan auctioned their legendary "The Black Lotus" to the
Lapmasters of Long Clan for an unprecedented 2000000
space-tix. This huge space-tix transfer will allow The Sons
to replace their aging armory of brain lasers and invest in
new Magic Online accounts.

Space-Colonel Jack Ng had this to say in an online space-
interview, "Without these new brain lasers we would not  
be able to feed our space-families. The new brain lasers
will be used to kill the Nubs we rely on to make space-
burgers and nutrient-juice." Space-Colonel Ng added, "The
Magic Online accounts are necessary for communications
between our space-colonies, and to test our MUC decks.
Ng Out LOL"

According to space-scientists, the "The Black Lotus"
gained notoriety due to the fact it is made from paper, a by-
product of a long-extinct beast, known as "Trees."
Shrouded in myth and conjecture, "The Black Lotus" and
its abilities were recently revealed.

Magic Online Historian Dr. Gekky Weaselbutt recently
published in his latest thesis, "The rediscovery of the Lotus
as a card was a bit of a disappointment for space-people
born after The Great Power Creep of the 215th Century
when Maro's Brain-in-a-jar slew Gleemax. If a player  
really needs to add mana to their pool to combat Nubs they
could use the much quicker Grak's Managoonz or the
common Space Lands. What is of note is the Lotus is an
artifact without a subtype צ, unknown since 31337 VD."

The winner of the auction, Lapmasters of Long, is a very
wealthy Magic Online Clan. Much of their fortune has  
been gained selling "Winning Space-Secrets©" to the alien
race known as Nubs. What the Lapmasters plan on doing
with "The Black Lotus" is anyone's guess. Lapmaster's
chairman, a virus known as Mike.EXE, put out this press

"MAGIC SECRETS REVEALED! Internal Space Server
Error: Please send the file 80085_80_176_NOV.rtfm to EXE Out LOL."

Tarkon-Fuentes Out LOL

Related Articles:
Is our space-food safe?: brain lasers and you
Mike.EXE virus spreads with help from Nubs
Maro’s Brain-in-a-jar gives itself raise, promotes "to stay

צ SRC:12004th Edition Comprehensive Rules

-- phodos