Terrifying, Overpowering Demigod Slain By Local Wizard In Like Two Seconds

Posted on January 22, 2009
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BANT — A brief moment of terror began and ended abruptly as the overpowering demigod Nicol Bolas was slain nearly instantly by a local wizard during the horrible monstrosity’s invasion Thursday.

The fearsome and near-omnipotent planeswalking elder dragon appeared here early Thursday morning, announcing his presence to local passers-by at a castle market.

“SUPPLICATE ME ALL, FOR I AM NICOL BOLAS, THE ENDING OF WORLDS AND –” the elder dragon told reporters.

“Celestial purge!” interrupted local wizard Ratford Smallheels, waving away the planeswalker into oblivion.

Local shoppers then continued with their purchases Thursday.

“Man, that was utterly terrifying for a second there!” said one resident. “There was almost like a complete moment where I was petrified,” added the resident.

“Wow, I’ve never seen anything like that,” said a local man. “It was some kind of big dragon or something, and it appeared and disappeared in a blink,” he said.

“Probably some kind of ‘blink dragon,’” he added.

Smallheels would not speak to reporters Thursday, saying that the brief interruption of the terrifying monster threatened to make him late for a physician’s appointment.

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