Rakdos Cult Calls For Cease-Fire To Have Time To Summon More Demons

Posted on August 27, 2009
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RAVNICA — The Cult of Rakdos pressed for a cease-fire in its weeks-long battle with the Azorius Senate on Tuesday, saying that a cessation of hostilities would be beneficial because it would give the cult time to summon more demons.

“A halt to all of this violence, this bloodshed and this destruction of buildings is needed immediately,” said Rakdos, the cult parun.

“That will allow us to regroup, rearm ourselves, summon more demons and then resume the violence, bloodshed and destruction of buildings,” he said.

“Right now, it’s disproportionate because we’re fresh out of demons,” Rakdos added.

The cult parun assured reporters Tuesday that the group had the upper hand in the conflict.

“We’re winning this battle,” Rakdos said. “We made it look like more people got killed on our side than got killed on their side. That means we won,” he said at a news conference.

“Also, when I angrily pump my fist up and down, that also means we won,” Rakdos said, pumping his fist.

- Aug. 29, 2006

Comments

One Response to “Rakdos Cult Calls For Cease-Fire To Have Time To Summon More Demons”

  1. Stone on August 30th, 2009 4:25 pm

    As an Israeli, I approve of this article.

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